Futurama (or something like it)

My dream last night was really long and intricate, but I will tell you the gist: it involved a program that allowed people to project their minds into the future, where their minds were then placed into clones of their bodies, so that essentially, anyone could visit the future.

In the future, every city was like its own floating planet (covered and oxygenated), and to travel between cities you were sucked up through these vents and changed into a million tiny particles and the particles were magnetized so that you would land in exactly the right spot on the next city.

In the dream, I and my immediate family used this program to travel to the future Oklahoma City. We visited the future OKC Zoo (where the animals roamed more free because they were more tame - and where I saw a man dressed as a gorilla who I decided to call Gorilla Man & who appears later in the dream). Later we decide to visit the future Amazon Forest. After our trip we have to travel back through our vent. Gorilla Man shows up and travels at the same time. We all get sucked up.

This part of the dream was really cool, because it felt like I was flying/free falling through the sky as my "particles" floated back toward the ground. When I landed, my family was nowhere to be found. Suddenly my mom called me to find out where I was. The phone call was brief.

After that I finally found my mom - but she had NO idea who I was. Soon I discovered that somehow, instead of the normal time frame, I had been transported back FOUR MONTHS from when I was supposed to return from the Amazon. And now, my family couldn't remember who I was. But then how did my mother call me, I wondered!

Desperate, I made an announcement over the city intercom asking for Gorilla Man to meet me where we first saw each other (in the OKC Zoo). A few hours later, he met me there, and he remembered who I was. So why didn't anyone else?! This is when I woke up.

Evidence of my TV addiction

Last night I had one of the weirdest dreams I've had in a long time, and it proved to me that I have been watching WAY too much tv. Here's what happened: a bunch of people were kidnapped by the guy who plays Danny on The Mindy Project. He was a creepy but lonely (and bored) millionaire who decided he wanted to reenact the Hunger Games. So he kidnaps me (and I am myself, but I look like Reviva from Underemployed, which I was watching last night), several cast members of Glee (including Chord Overstreet, the girl who plays Tina Chang, the guy who plays Kurt, and a few more I can't remember), Shay Mitchell from Pretty Little Liars, and Nick Miller from New Girl. He places us all in a glass cage and orders us to fight to death or he will kill us all himself. Only one can live. At first no one fights but then he shoots one of the contestants, after which they all start in. At one point he electrifies all of the weapons so that we can't pick them up, so that everyone is forced to fight hand-to-hand combat. Early in the game (I've been hiding and avoiding mutilation), he pulls me out of the competition. He says it's because of my child. (I don't actually have a child, but Reviva from Underemployed does... so maybe I was more her than me.) He makes me sit out next to him and watch the rest of the contestants kill each other. A little later he pulls Nick Miller out too but doesn't say why. Eventually, all of the contestants are dead because the last one was stabbed already and he bled to death. He forces Nick and I to return to the arena and threatens to kill my baby if we don't fight. Instantly I pick up one of the electrified guns and shoot Nick in the chest. Now the weirdest part: at the end of the dream, right before I woke up, everyone that was dead in the arena, including Nick, stands up. None of them were actually dead. They were all hired actors, in on it, except for me. That's when I woke up. It was an intense dream.

December 11, 2012.

I came to a mandatory presentation given by the school. It was about some kind of new aptitude test created by these two young geniuses in their mid-20's who had made millions from it, and the school asked them to come speak about the test and administer it to a select group of students. I was one of the students selected to take the test.

As we were taking it, the two young men walked around the room perusing the test takers. One of them, tall and handsome (and looking a lot like Joel David Moore), caught my eye and seemed to have been intrigued because he kept coming back to the same spot and just looking at me. Once the test was over, most everyone started to leave. He came up to me and asked what I thought of the test. "It was very personal," I said. "Which is new for an aptitude test, since they generally ask generic, do you ever do this and how often questions."

He smiled. We continued talking for several more minutes until soon we noticed that everyone else had left. He looked a little shy and quietly said, "You know, I don't normally do this, because I'm a professional. But I have really enjoyed talking to you and I wondered if you might let me take you to dinner."

On a whim I said yes and I gave him my number. A few days later he took me out to a really nice dinner and a carriage ride. I really enjoyed myself and grew to like him a lot. We went back to his hotel room (he was just visiting for the test, you see).

I told him after he kissed me and we went inside that I don't normally do things like this. We made love and then fell asleep together. In the morning, I had to leave for work. I rolled over to him and gave him a quick kiss on the lips, which he returned with a strange, surprised expression. "You don't normally do things like this, do you? Take a woman on a date, spend the morning with her after."

He shook his head, almost blushing. "Then why start with me?"

"I don't know, really. There's just something so intriguing about you. I can't seem to get enough." I smiled.

"I wish I didn't have to work today." But I did. I got up. "Can I use your shower?" He said of course. "I'd like to see you again, if you want to," I said, peeking out from behind the bathroom door.

He grinned and nodded. Then I woke up.

October 24, 2012.

I dreamed I was taking a college course & fell in love with the professor. One night, he & all his students were at the bar, celebrating something. Everyone else left & it was just the two of us. We took a cab to my apartment, where he planned on just walking to my door & leaving. But at my door, I kissed him.

He didn't resist, & came inside, spending the night. A few days later he broke it off, saying that he was too old for me & that he was my teacher and he could lose his job. I was mad and stormed out.

After a few weeks, he started dating another, slightly more age-appropriate woman. A few weeks after that she turned up pregnant. This made me even more mad, and I stopped speaking to him altogether. If class forced me to talk to him, I was terse & snappy. Everyone could see how horribly unhappy I was but nobody could do anything about it but him.

Several months go by & there's some kind of huge celebration at the school. He and his now very pregnant girlfriend are both there, and he allows the rest of the students to have a chill day. One of the other students puts on some music for a "dance party," which we put on outside on the lawn. While the other students are dancing, he keeps stealing glances at me. Finally his girlfriend drags him into the dance floor. I get up to leave, feeling sick.

As I cross the lawn, the sprinklers come on, causing me to slip & fall and hit my head. I start laughing. At first everyone is pleased because its been a long time since I laughed. But when I can't stop laughing, they call an ambulance.

Against the protests of his girlfriend, he comes with me in the ambulance to the hospital. They tell him that I had a minor concussion & they need to keep me overnight for observation to make sure the swelling goes down, and that he needs to make sure I stay awake. He stays in my room, playing word games & card games with me for many hours, both of us laughing and having a good time. He asks what's different about now & the rest of the time, why am usually so unhappy?

I tell him it's because of him. "You make me happy. I thought you knew, but maybe you don't... I'm in love with you. When you unceremoniously dumped me, I hated you. But not for very long. Then I kept loving you, but you kept loving her. Which is why I was so unhappy."

He shook his head. "But I don't love her. Those aren't even my babies. She tried to make me think they were, but I did the math. They're definitely not." I didn't say anything, but stared at him intensely. "I don't love her," he said, "because this whole time, I've still been in love with you."

He leaned over and kissed me. I cry. "But we can't even be together. They'll fire you if they ever find out."

"Then we won't let them find out," he smiled. "And as soon as I break the news to her, we can be together." He kissed me again & I woke up.

August 22, 2012

Part of my dream last night involved my cell phone being coated in peanut butter & chocolate like a Nutter Butter and I have no idea why.

July 7, 2012

One of the most popular guys in school has started giving me a lot of attention. We begin hanging out frequently. Soon his popular friends are also hanging out with me (these were some popular people I knew in high school). One night I finally tell him that it feels wrong, that he and I should stop spending so much time together. I turn to leave and he admits that he is falling in love with me. He kisses me.

The next night is a football game. He is playing, and I am sitting in the stands with some of his closest friends. The game is tied and we are all watching frantically, me especially since I don't like football and I'm worried for his safety. Suddenly he is pummeled and dog piled by half of the other team. When they get up, he doesn't. I clasp my hand over my mouth & his friends turn to look at me. When the medic runs onto the field, I stand up in alarm. They're still staring at me. I run down to the field as fast as I can and demand to ride in the ambulance with him as they carry him out on a stretcher.

At the hospital he is asleep in the bed, his grandfather and I sitting in the chairs by his bed. He wakes up and sees me and asks what I'm doing here in a kind of harsh tone. I tell him he broke his leg and his arm and that he has a concussion. He asks what I'm doing here again. I tell him I wanted to make sure he was okay. "Get out," he says.

"What? No."

His grandfather stands and says he'll give us a minute, then leaves.

"I said get out!"

"And I said no!"

He turns his face to me angrily, when before he had it turned away. "What did you think? That because we kissed that makes me your boyfriend? Well I'm not. You can just leave."

"Maybe you misheard me. I'm NOT leaving."

"I don't love you. It was a lie. It was a DARE. There's nothing for you here. So just GET OUT."

I start to leave. I turn to say, "You're a liar and a coward, but I hope you're happy," with a sharp tone. Then I leave.

His grandpa comes back in & asks where I went.

"I made her leave. I didn't want her here to see me like this."

He grimaces and sits down. "You're a damned fool. That girl loves you, & only an imbecile gives that up willingly."

The next day I'm invited to a party by one of his friends. I tell her we broke up. "Ha, that's too bad. But I like you better than him anyway! Don't tell him." I go to the party, everyone asks about him. I tell them what happened but that we broke up. They're all very apologetic. That's where the dream ended.

May 11, 2012

Last night I had a dream about tornadoes. I hid inside a box in my closet. Thankfully, the tornado passed over us. I got up and looked at the window, and watched as two tornadoes collided not far from my house. The first tornado bumped into the second, reversing directions and heading straight for us again. I opened my window and asked the tornado to please not hit my house. The tornado talked back and said she would be careful and try not to hit my home. Suffice it to say, it was a REALLY weird dream. No, I didn't have any Loco Hot Cocoa last night!

I dreamed I was in love with a murderer.

We'd been in love for a while, not having slept together due to my wanting to wait until marriage, but having both recently told the other that we loved them.

I came to his house one day to find a woman murdered on his kitchen floor, blood pooling around her and him staring down at her solemnly, at least until I walked in. I must have had a key. In any case, he was shocked to see me, to say the least.

"It's not what it looks like," he said.

I hesitated. "....It looks like you killed the woman currently lying in a heap on your floor."

He paused, glanced down. Put his hand - splattered with blood - to his forehead. "Okay. So maybe it is what it looks like."

I didn't have much time to react to that fact. In an instant we were both on the ground, on the far side of the kitchen from the dead woman, having just been shoved there by two tall, beautiful, sexy women, who had burst through the door and thrust guns in our faces.

They greeted him like they knew him - said his name even (though I doubt in the dream it was of much importance, as I can't even remember it now) - and one, the blond one, dressed in a black suit and high heels, talked to us, while the other, the brunette, dressed similarly, rushed outside only to return moments later with a large tarp, which she began wrapping the deceased in.

The blond was talking to me, most specifically. Asking me if I actually knew what my boyfriend did while I wasn't around. I shook my head no. She laughed, a nasty, guttural sound, and proceeded to inform me that my boyfriend did, in fact, kill people. That it was something they - meaning she and the other woman - made him do for them quite frequently, and in the off chance that he failed to murder one of their targets, well... he'd lose another loved one. He'd already lost two, shortly after they approached him with the impossible-to-escape position, and in the end he felt he had no choice and had resorted to the killing of what he could only hope were NOT innocent people. Now that was my mind filling in blanks, of course. She told me that he lost loved ones if he didn't do as he was told, and had already lost two, but it was my hopes that filled the gaps, my hopes that held out a small glimmer of faith that he only did it because he thought he had no other choice and that he endured with the assumption that they were not innocent people.

I glanced over at him, and saw only supreme fear on his face.

"In any case," she continued, "we're finally done with you." She was speaking to him now. She shifted the gun that had been previously pointed at the ground to a direct spot facing his head.

"No!" I shouted, and I threw myself in front of him. He tried to shove me away, speechless. She grew a bewildered smirk. "Don't," I pleaded, tears threatening to fall from my eyes.

"Fine," she shrugged, lowering the gun. "I won't kill him. But on one condition."

"Name it," I murmured, glaring into her empty, soulless eyes.

She laughed. "Feisty!" she giggled. Her friend had since disappeared, having pulled the rather bulky tarp out the door, and returned to clean up the blood. Now though, she was gone, who knows where? "Right. Well. My one condition. I won't kill him," here she grinned devilishly, "but you'll die in his place. And he'll do it."

I glanced at him, his eyes wide with fear and agony. "No."  He said firmly.

She crouched down, perched on her ankles. "Listen, buddy. She knows too much. You can live - you've kept our secret this long, anyway - but she's gotta go. We can't have her around trying to call the cops or the like. Look, we'll leave you alone to do it," she said, reaching over to grab the bloody scalpel he'd dropped when I walked in, and prancing over to the sink to rinse it off, and finally handing it to him. "But if we find out that you didn't go through with it, that's it. Both of you, and your family - consider them all dead. If, however, you do go through with it, we never want to hear from you again. Disappear, if you have to. But if I ever see your ugly face" (personally I found his face quite attractive) "again, I'll kill you with my own two hands. Capiche?"

He glanced at me, looked back at her... and nodded. That's when the tears in my eyes actually began to fall, if slowly.

She grinned and nodded briefly, then turned and left.

His kitchen looked like I'd seen it before, spotless and neat, as if nothing here that I'd just seen had even happened. Could I have imagined it all? But no, there he was, holding that scalpel, staring at me with tears in his eyes.

I don't know what made me do it. Call it impulse, insanity... what you will. But I lay back on the cold, hateful kitchen floor and yanked my shirt up to expose my stomach. "Do it," I said. "You've done it before, just do it. All your problems will be over." Though I hoped he wouldn't, I knew it was true. All he had to do was kill me and his life could go back to normal, as normal as it could be after such an occurrence as this.

His tears were heavy as they fell on my stomach, which he was leaning over, scalpel poised above my abdomen in his clenched fist. He hesitated, knowing what he should do and what he shouldn't. He pulled the scalpel down and gently traced a circle around my belly button. "I can't," he sobbed.

"You have to," I said. What was I doing? Giving away my life willingly for a man I thought I loved, who turns out is a murderer? Who was I in this moment? Not myself, to say the least. But there I was, saying those words, practically begging him to stab me.

"I can't." he said more firmly, tossing to scalpel to the floor, where it slid under the refrigerator. "Not because I physically can't. I've done it before, ashamed as I am to admit." Here I let out a small sob. He seemed to tense up, and placed his hand on my still exposed stomach. He relaxed a little, with the warm comfort of my skin against the sweaty palm of his hand. "No, I can't because... because there is no way imaginable... that I could live without you."

A full burst of tears flew out of my eyes, sobs ripping through my chest like fireworks. "No, please don't cry," he said. "I don't want to hurt you. I've never wanted to hurt you. I love you, so much. And I can't imagine another day without you. If you don't love me anymore, I understand. Completely, I do. And I'll find a way to make it look like I killed you but you can walk out of this house very much alive." My sobbing faded, and the tears, while still falling, were much less heavy.

"But if," he continued, a single tear slipping its way past his lashes and down to his nose. "If there's any chance that you still love me... stay. Don't leave. Be here with me. Know me for who I am - a murderer. But also know that it's over. I don't have to do it anymore. Stay here with me and be happy for the future." He had also been sprawled on the floor like me, that having given him better access to my stomach, but he had curled his legs up against me and was now cupping my face with his hand.

I looked into his eyes. I couldn't look away, how could I look away from the pure emotion there? Nothing like the eyes of that awful woman, her eyes had been empty, completely vacant of all emotion... but his eyes, which I had grown to love in the past months... his eyes seemed to display every emotion I could even imagine. But one thing was for sure, this man was in love with me.

I took a deep breath. "I hate you for what you did to those people," I spat. Another tear escaped his eye, and he removed his hand from my face. And I knew when I realized I didn't want him to that I was still madly in love with this man. "But," I said, placing my own hands on his neck, "I'm in love with you for who you are when you're with me." Then he kissed me, and I let him.

I pulled him away from me. "But I swear, if you ever kill another human being in your life, we're through." He actually laughed a little. "I'm not kidding. Don't even think about it. Not even animals."

He stood up, lifting me up with him, and I draped my arms around his neck. "No problem," he smiled, so happy I could see it in his eyes, feel it in his touch, as he led me to the bedroom.

The Vashta Nerada (a Doctor Who fandom post of sorts))

I'm the fairly stupid girl who went to bed last night after watching Silence in the Library and Forest of the Dead...

Consequently, after getting up to turn off the tv and turning off the light, I RAN to my bed and bundled under the covers, because I (ME: the girl who DOES NOT get scared after films, as in the girl who watches a scary movie and can go home calm because she knows it's not real) was afraid that the Vashta Nerada were going to eat me.

Like, honestly.

Very few times have I been that scared in my life.

I literally prayed.

I think it's because, with most other scary films, films with ghosts or demons (which frankly I don't usually watch because I find them insipid and stupid), they're not real to me. I don't believe in ghosts the way others believe in ghosts (and that's hard to explain, so I'm just not going to), and demons only have a limited level of power (nowhere near the level of power exercised by the devil, and completely incomparable to the power owned by God) in my eyes, so these things do not cause me great fear.

But aliens!

Oh, how I believe in aliens. There's not a doubt in my mind that there are other creatures up there. That's the thing though... I've never met any. They could be kind, cruel, evil, destructive, gentle... and I don't even know, because I've never met one.

That's what makes the Vashta Nerada so scary for me. For me, they could be as real as the toes on my feet.

*shivers*

January 18, 2012

Last night I was watching a weird but interesting show, so I assumed that's what I would dream about, because that's usually what happens. No. I dreamed about making spaghetti in Walmart and losing my coat.

January 17, 2012

Who dreams about brushing their teeth?! Apparently I do. Weirdo.